I'm Still Your Brother
by MissCrowley
Summary: It's been two weeks since Dean has awoken as a demon, and he's adjusting to it pretty well with Crowley's help. Sam and Castiel are intent on fixing Dean, although Dean doesn't seem to share the same sentiment. (Strong slash after first chapter, language, Wincest, eventual Sastiel, and other pairings.)
1. Chapter 1

"Sammy, you okay?"

Sam tensed the moment he heard his brother's voice. Dean was like a damned ninja anymore with the way he would just appear out of nowhere. It was something Sam was afraid he would never get used to. There was a lot he was going to have to learn to adjust to if he planned on getting along with his brother and his new... problem.

"Damn it Dean, do you really have to keep doing that?" Sam huffed as he focused back on the book he'd been reading just seconds ago. It wasn't anything related to any sort of case; they hadn't been on the hunt for some time now ever since Dean had become Hell's newest MVP.

"Do what?" Dean smirked and rounded Sam's chair as he pushed the book out of his brother's hands. "I'm just concerned about my baby boy."

"_Don't_ call me that." Sam leaned back as far as he possibly could, just hoping that some miracle would allow him to fade through the back of the chair. Dean feigned a hurt look and flashed a glimpse of his black eyes before they turned green once more. That was another thing Sam would never get used to. Quite frankly it still freaked him the fuck out.

"Awww, come on Sammy. You'll always be my baby boy." Dean brought a hand up to the side of Sam's face, much to Sam's displeasure, and he drew back. A pissy expression crossed the older Winchester's face and he shifted to sit on the table before Sam. "Just because I'm 'different' now doesn't mean I still can't be concerned about my little brother. You've been bein' a bitch for days."

Sam squinted his eyes in irritation and focused on Dean, who had taken to flipping through the book on the table beside him. "Oh, I dunno. Maybe it's because you've been hanging around Crowley a little too much. Maybe, just maybe it's because you don't really seem to be too concerned about becoming cured."

Dean gave an exasperated sigh and rolled his eyes. "Seriously? That's it? I'm fine, man-" A look of pure anger crossed Dean's features as Sam stood from his chair. He grunted in surprise as his body was involuntarily slammed back into place. "No, you're not going anywhere. Stop bein' a whiny bitch."

"Let me go, Dean!" Sam grabbed onto the arms of the chair and squeezed in a futile attempt to stand. It was pointless. When Dean wanted to be a dick, he held nothing back anymore. It had only been a few weeks, but it seemed he was becoming just a bit too comfortable with his new abilities. He could take Sam's voice away when he became annoyed, and he would often appear out of nowhere in the middle of the night while Sam was wandering back to his room from the bathroom, just to scare the living shit out of him. Of course Dean got a kick out of it every time. Sam was not so amused.

"No. You will sit there and you will listen. I'm still Dean fuckin' Winchester and I always will be. I may not give a shit about a lot of things anymore, but there is one thing in this whole world that becoming a demon can't get between; us, Sam. I'm still your brother."

"The Dean I knew would never do this. He would never let himself become this obsessed with demonic power." Dean laughed humorlessly and fell back onto his hands.

"Right, because a few harmless pranks equal abusing 'demonic power'."

"What do you call this then? I doubt holding me against my will is a harmless prank." Sam glared into Dean's eyes, and the two held each other off for some time before Dean finally relented and relaxed his hold on Sam. The taller man stood and remained where he was – not because he cared what Dean had to say, nor was it due to the fact that he was a bit frightened of Dean, which he wasn't. He just simply wanted to because he could. Because it was his free will. He was perfectly capable of handling things himself, and he could certainly handle what Dean had to say even if he really did just want to sulk off and be alone. "So what's your deal then? You want me to talk so I'll talk."

"I know you're pissed because I've been with Crowley."

"Yeah, and? You've been attached at the hip." Dean flashed his demon eyes (he really had to stop that, Sam thought) and bit his lip.

"You jealous?" Sam looked away in mock disgust. It was true he had a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach every time he got wind that Dean and Crowley were together. It was 'demon business' and all, Sam knew that, but it wasn't the way things were supposed to be. Dean was supposed to be working with Sam to become cured, not working with Crowley to learn the ins and outs of Hell. Well, that's what Sam assumed was happening anyway. It could have been a myriad of things, but it didn't really matter what it was. Crowley could be taking Dean away to save the fucking whales for all Sam cared, but it was still time spent with the King of Hell, which wasn't exactly the best thing for Dean right now. The guy was going to plunge further and further South with his new abilities and status – he was as crazy powerful as Cain now – and Sam wasn't ready to deal with full-on-I-don't-give-any-flying-fucks-demon-Dean. Dean was obviously not his old self of course. He did still harbor, or at least he said so, feelings for Sam and Cas. They were family and nothing would ever change that.

Sam lightened up a bit and let out a deep breath to calm his nerves. Dean was still watching him intently, patience a new concept his demon self had apparently developed. "Look, Dean... I just want you to keep your priorities straight. We need to keep you as human as possible for as long as possible. Don't lose sight of who you really are or we may never get you back."

"'We' as in you and Cas?" Dean scoffed and leaped from the table to stand before his taller brother. "I doubt Cas wants anything to do with me as it is. He's an angel, I'm a demon. That's not exactly an award-winning combination."

"I know, but he still cares about you. I still care about you. You're my brother. You're all I've got and I'm going to fix this. I know you want to fix this too." Dean crossed his arms and lowered his head, staring at the space between his feet. "'I'm proud of us', remember? You said that to me, Dean. That's gotta mean something."

Dean cringed and swayed on the spot as he stepped back to create distance. "Don't remind me of chick flick moments, okay?"

"I'm being serious. That's the first time you've ever acknowledged that you were proud of yourself, and that was a big step for you. Don't lose that, Dean."

"Let that part of you keep you human."

The brothers turned to seek out the source of the gravelly voice and found Castiel standing in the entryway to the bunker. Sam hadn't a clue how long the angel had been there, but Dean seemed unfazed. He half smiled and lifted his chin in a display of self confidence as his eyes met with the angel's.

"'Sup Cas."

"Dean." It was a greeting, but not a warm one. This hadn't escaped Dean's notice as Castiel descended the stairs to meet them. It seemed he hadn't expected Dean to be present. "Hello, Sam."

"Hey Cas. What brings you here?" Castiel stopped before the brothers and glanced carefully at Dean before responding.

"We had some work to attend to the last time I was here." Dean's eyes lowered in irritation at Castiel's vague response. Sam just looked nervously between the two for a moment, finally settling on the idea of privacy.

"Yeah, that's right. Um... did you find the information we needed?"

"It took me a while, but I was able to find something sufficient."

Dean had had enough of their secrecy and split instantly in the blink of an eye. Unfortunately becoming a demon made it easier for Dean to disappear whenever he found it convenient, and it was no easy task finding out where he'd gone to. Since becoming a demon, Dean no longer held as much of an interest for his late night bar trips, nor did he find his long therapeutic drives in the Impala as helpful as they used to be. Who knew where he went off to now. Sam only hoped it wasn't the one place he shouldn't be.

Sam shrugged and returned his focus to Cas, who had already crossed the room to the large desk in the middle to deposit a few books. "Cas, can I ask you something?"

The angel straightened and brought his full attention to Sam. "What is it you need to ask?"

"Are you and Dean gonna be okay? You've been kinda distant with him. I mean, I know he's a demon and you're an angel, but we've worked with demons before that you didn't really mind. Like Meg."

"Dean and I share a profound bond. I will do my best to return him to normal, but I cannot say that I am entirely comfortable with the company he has been keeping."

"I'm not either, Cas. I'm worried that Crowley has other plans for Dean, and you know how pig-headed he can get."

"We should get to work. I am sure Dean will be fine for now, but I fear that we don't have much longer before he begins to lose himself completely."

"But there's a chance that he won't? Isn't it possible for a demon to still remain true to their human selves? I mean, look at Cain. He fell in love with a human and he stopped everything. He stopped everything for one person."

"That is true. We have no idea how Dean will respond to this new state of being, however. The Dean we know is capable of anything, but we will have to try to trust him for now." Sam laughed humorlessly at the word 'trust'. "We must believe in him, Sam. Dean may have made a terrible mistake, but there is hope that we can reverse this."

"So what... He has to transfer the mark of Cain then? That's the only way I can even see this happening."

"That isn't an option. The mark is a curse that needs to cease being transferred. We will just be placing the problem on someone else."

"Do you think giving him human blood will work? It worked on Crowley."

"That is true, but standard methods of harming a demon did not affect Cain, therefore it may not affect Dean. We can only assume at this point that what would work on an average demon will not work on Dean. The mark is undoubtedly a power in itself to be reckoned with."

Sam dropped into a chair and rubbed his eyes. He was growing mentally exhausted over the entire thing and just wanted to sleep. He glanced at the liquor glass bottle within his arm's reach and fought an inner battle with himself. Drinking away frustration was a bad habit that he'd always harped on Dean about before; he didn't need to pick up the old habit himself. Regardless of this fact, Sam reached for the ornate glass bottle and tumbler. A hand clamped onto his wrist before he could open the topper.

"I need you to be with me, Sam. Now is not the time to drown sorrows. There is hope." Sam looked up at Castiel and saw a light smile playing upon the angel's blue eyes, his mouth slightly curved upward in a kind expression. "You Winchesters have always managed to break the rules before." Sam smiled and forgot the liquor sitting before him.

"You're right. I suppose that's enough to go on then." He stretched and sat up straight, pulling one of the ancient texts toward him. "So, what have you found?"


	2. Chapter 2

A few hours after Castiel had left Sam was still reading. The books were ancient, and some of the letters, like 's', were replaced with 'f' and other quips that were similar. It took a bit longer to read than usual, and some portions were in an entirely different language altogether. Sam's head was beginning to hurt by the time he closed his laptop and he leaned back in his chair. Dean still hadn't popped back in and Sam was growing worried again. He hated not knowing where Dean was anymore. Even if he was still his brother he couldn't be trusted entirely, and that fact alone hurt Sam much deeper than anything else. Dean was all he had in the world anymore it seemed, and even that was compromised now.

Sam stood a bit too quickly and stumbled forward to catch himself as his head spun. It had been a hell of an afternoon that was now fading into night. Some fresh air was much needed, so Sam decided to take advantage of the nice summer weather and made his way up the stairs, sliding open the door to the bunker and stepping out into the cooler night air. It was still warm out, if not a bit muggy, but it was cooler than it had been earlier that day. Crickets were chirping in the distance and the sky was clear – thousands of stars and the moon clearly visible in the inky black sky. It was much more relaxing than sitting inside, and Sam fell onto the grass down the hill a way to take advantage of the atmosphere. He laid back with his hands behind his head and closed his eyes, the night air filling his lungs as he took a deep breath.

"Done scheming behind my back?"

Sam gasped and jumped up as he spun around to see Dean sitting beside him. "You really, really need to stop doing that."

"Hey, it's fun okay?" Dean leaned back on his hands and gazed at the stars. "Besides, when's the last time we got to play any pranks on each other and enjoy it?"

"Since when do demons enjoy playing silly human pranks?" The words sounded a bit more sarcastic than Sam had intended, and he mentally hit himself when he realized it. He couldn't get over his 'thing' about demons, even if it was Dean. He just didn't trust them, and he most certainly didn't think of them as human in any way. He often forgot that some demons were human once, and one was sitting right next to him. Dean had been the only 'newly born' demon he'd ever had to deal with anyway, so he wasn't even sure about what took place or if there was any sort of transitional period where the demon would retain its humanity before being completely consumed. When Dean had awakened he'd been a mess of course, but it only took him a few days to begin to adjust. That was the thing that bothered Sam. Rather it was Crowley's demon counseling sessions or Dean himself, or even the mark, Sam couldn't figure out why Dean had changed so quickly. It was best not to dwell on. He needed to focus on fixing Dean as soon as possible.

Dean shifted in the grass and frowned up at the moon, his demon eyes flashing for a bit longer than usual as he stared deeply into the glowing rock out in space. "It's weird. The things I can see now."

"What can you see?" Sam tried not to react negatively toward the black eyes, but he still bit down on the inside of his cheek to keep from cringing. He hated seeing Dean like that.

Dean's eyes flashed back to familiar green as he looked over at Sam. "Out there. I can see everything, and it's nothin' like what I thought it would be."

"I can imagine it's just an infinite mass of nothing."

"It doesn't seem so big anymore." Dean closed his eyes and huffed, shaking his head and focusing on the grass between his legs. "I know you don't trust me, Sam."

"You know how I am with demons, Dean."

"I know, I know. I get it." Dean lifted his head and chewed on his lip, then glanced over at Sam and scooted a bit closer, throwing an arm around his brother's shoulders. "I'm still your big brother, you know that."

"Yeah, but for how long?" Sam avoided Dean's gaze and frowned.

"Really? I'm tryin' to be reassuring here."

"I know. I'm sorry, it's just... you're a demon now. I'm going to fix you, but I don't know how long it's going to take. I just hope you don't lose your head before I can find a cure that actually works."

"I lost my head a long time ago." Sam looked over at Dean, who was smiling and gazing fondly upon his younger brother. It made Sam feel a bit uneasy, the look that Dean was giving him. It was full of contentment, which wasn't something Dean should have felt. Dean should have been angry and confused, upset and disturbed at what he'd become. Dean was now the very thing he'd always hunted, but he seemed to be at peace with it. Or at least he was faking it pretty damn well. At least one thing was certain: Dean was still in there and they had time. There were a few things off about him, yeah, but he was still Dean for the time being. Crowley hadn't taken that away yet, and Sam was almost certain that Crowley would leap at the chance to have Dean on his side completely. A hot rush of anger inflamed Sam's senses at the very thought. Dean was not and would never be family to Crowley. He refused to believe Dean would ever be that close to a thing like that.

"Dean..." Sam had to choose his words carefully. He didn't want to Dean to run. "What do you and Crowley do when you're spending time with him?" Thankfully Dean didn't respond negatively.

"Nothin' important. To be honest, I don't even know if I care for the guy. King of Hell or not, I could still kick his ass." Sam smiled and held back a laugh. At least he could find comfort in that much. To even think that Dean and Crowley were becoming 'besties'... the idea made him laugh.

"I suppose that's the best I'll get out of you right now."

"Hey, I could have said nothing."

"I was half expecting you to just disappear." Dean became thoughtful for a moment, then turned to look at the Impala before them.

"Really no point." Sam watched as the door to the Impala opened itself and the engine went into reserve. The radio came on, and as Dean lifted his hand and turned an invisible knob before him the sound of 'Beast of Burden' by The Rolling Stones drifted through the night. He looked way too pleased with himself. "Fuckin' sweet."

Sam shook his head and laughed. "I guess I should be content with the fact that most of the time you use that on trivial stuff."

"Hey, simple things, man." Dean looked into Sam's eyes, and Sam returned the gesture. For a moment Sam saw the Dean he'd met years ago on that crazy night. He had been 22, and Dean 26. They were so young then – completely unprepared for all of the shit that they would soon be facing. Losing Jessica was just a precursor; Sam had naively thought that it was as bad as things were going to get. Then things got even more complicated, there was the apocalypse, then Sam lost his soul and got it back, Dean was in Purgatory... So much had happened since then. And now this. This definitely fit right in with everything else.

Dean moved the hand resting on his brother's shoulder and smoothed it along his jawline, watching with interest as Sam flinched. "Dean..." Before Sam could even continue his disturbing line of thought his older brother had him pinned on the ground, hands above his head in a death grip. More memories flashed through Sam's mind, and he remembered staring up at Dean's face for the first time in a few years back when they were young, back on that first night when Dean had come to retrieve him and steal him from his apple pie life.

"Woah there, tiger." Dean smiled as he said it, surprising Sam as he tried his hardest to close off his mind.

"How did you even...?"

"I know things, dude. The night I destroyed your life, right?"

"You didn't destroy my life, Dean. I chose to go with you after everything that happened." Sam turned his head to avoid the awkward distance between them and caught a glimpse of the mark on Dean's arm. He brought a hand up and ran a finger along the raised flesh, which was oddly starting to go down. The mark was there as strong as ever, as red as ever, but it seemed to be taking to Dean's skin as if it were a permanent part of him now. It was no longer a battle. Now it was just... there. Dean's shiver didn't go unnoticed by Sam, who quickly looked back up at his brother's face. There was something odd there that Sam had never seen before. "Dean?"

"Sammy." Dean didn't give Sam a chance to react. His hot breath was on Sam's neck coming out in steady warm puffs, his lips resting against the pulsing vein that gave away Sam's nervous pounding heart. "Baby boy."

"Dean, we can't..." Dean shushed Sam with a quick kiss against his skin.

"Don't. Don't give me the whole 'we're brother's' speech. Doesn't matter anymore."

"This is wrong. Demon or not this is wrong."

"I said shut up Sam." Anger shone in Dean's eyes as he lifted his head and stared into Sam's soul, his jaw clenching tight as he tried to tame the fire growing inside him. "Don't you fucking deny it."

"There's nothing to deny. What is wrong with you? I'm your brother, Dean!"

"Is that supposed to change anything? 'Cuz it sure as hell doesn't."

"What's going on? Seriously, just talk to me. I promise I won't get grossed out."

"Right. You're going to listen to a demon."

"Maybe I will. Just try me."

"Oh, I wanna try you, baby boy."

Sam swallowed hard as Dean pressed into him. He felt sick to his stomach as confusion consumed his mind. He didn't know how to feel or what to do, but he was sure that he was stuck at least for now. Dean's superhuman strength had him pinned to the ground and he definitely wasn't going anywhere. He was lying beneath his own brother under the stars, and he knew in the rational part of his brain that it was wrong on so many levels. It defied the rules of nature and morality, but to honestly put that in perspective where Dean was concerned was pointless. Demons had no sense of morality, nor did they obey any sort of law of nature. At least, that was to Sam's current understanding.

"Dean, stop. This is fucked up. You don't want to do this."

"I think I know myself a lot better now than I used to. So don't tell me what I do or do not want." Dean dived back into Sam's neck, opening his mouth and latching on until he heard Sam groan in pain. He lifted his head and watched the blood pool to the surface of the skin where he'd left his mark. "You're mine."

Sam's breath caught in his throat as Dean's lips pressed against his. His older brother wasn't about to ease him into things either; Dean slid his tongue along the crease of Sam's lips before biting down, forcing Sam to open them as he moaned in pain. His brother's tongue felt so strange in his mouth as Dean pressed harder against him, Sam's lips feeling warm and bruised from the deep kiss that Dean was attempting to coax him into returning. It was too much. Sam needed to think, but he couldn't while his brother was devouring him. He honestly didn't know how he felt about what was happening. He loved Dean, but as family. As a brother should love his brother, but he'd never thought about anything more. At least he'd never had to think about it until now. The thought would have never crossed his mind otherwise.

Dean relented a bit and softened the kiss while slowly rolling his hips to try to gain some relief. Sam could tell that his brother was already becoming aroused by their kisses alone, and he felt his own body begin to react. He tried to will away the burn that had formed down below by reasoning with himself, but nothing was working. The only thing he could do at this point was to fight and get Dean off of him. He needed to get away so he could think.

Dean noticed his struggles and smiled against his lips, lifting his head to look down at his brother in his flustered state. A mischievous look made Dean's eyes seem to glow in the night, and he brought his wrist to his mouth where he bit down until it bled. Sam's eyes shot to the crimson liquid now dripping onto his cheek, and he knew what was coming.

"Dean stop... Don't!"

"Welcome back, Sammy."

Dean pressed his wrist against Sam's mouth, clenching his fist to get a steady flow started. Sam fought it as long as he could manage by sealing his lips as tightly as possible until it hurt, but it was useless to fight Dean anymore. His brother had gotten used to playing dirty by now, and thrust his hips forward again and again until the heat was building back up within Sam's abdomen.

"You know you want it, baby boy."

Sam's lips eventually weakened and began to tremble, allowing a small line of blood to seep past across his clenched teeth. It was all it took before he felt his heart pound hard once, then again, and faster as his pulse picked up speed. His eyes opened wide and he broke free of his brother's hold, grabbing onto Dean's arm and opening his mouth to the exotic drug leaking onto his tongue. Dean moaned as he felt Sam suck hard against his wrist; the blood leaving his veins in a forced pull was equally as painful as it was pleasing to his demonic senses.

"Oh,_ fuck_ Sammy."

Sam pulled away at once, blood smeared along his lips. Dean's eyes flashed black momentarily as his arousal pulsed in his veins, and Sam took the moment to sit up and latch onto Dean, kissing him hard until the pain was almost unbearable. The rush of raw power within Sam was enough to ignite the flame within him the rest of the way until he was burning. He was soon on Dean's lap, their bodies grinding together to find release. Dean had dug his fingers into Sam's ass as he moved his hips against him, their jeans straining over their painful erections as they muffled their moans through rough and messy kisses. It didn't take Sam long before he was coming, his mouth latched on to Dean's neck as he attempted to keep from moaning his brother's name. Dean wasn't far behind as he arched his back and shamelessly cried obscenities into the night. They were both entirely wrecked by that point, Sam more so than Dean.

When everything finally calmed and all that remained was the small buzz in their bodies, Sam fell back onto the grass and stared into the sky. He ran his tongue across his bottom lip to remind himself that it was real. The taste of blood was still there, and his lips were throbbing from the abuse they had suffered from earlier. This was eased by a light kiss placed upon them by Dean, who had hovered back over Sam just long enough to do so. He backed off then and turned to look at the Impala, turning off the car and shutting the door.

"Don't ever say I did nothin' for you, baby boy."

"Jesus Christ, what did we just do?"

"Somethin' I wouldn't mind repeating. You're gonna need it now." Dean stared down at Sam fondly from his sitting position. "Now you got no choice but to trust me."

"Fuck..." Sam ran his hands down over his eyes and rubbed them hard. There were so many things he could have said or tried during that whole mess, but nothing had come to mind when he'd needed it. The exorcisms, the chants, all the useful stuff he'd stored in his brain ages ago were a mushy mess now. He wasn't even sure they'd have worked in hindsight. Dean wasn't your average demon, which meant that the blood now coursing through Sam wasn't average demon blood either. Not only was the addiction back, but the raw power contained within it was increased tenfold.


	3. Chapter 3

Only a day had gone by and things were going to hell fast. Sam had avoided Dean as much as possible, and surprisingly Dean didn't go out of his way to invade Sam's space. A small part of Sam wanted to believe that his brother had some humanity left, enough to feel guilty for what he'd pulled the night before. He knew that wasn't the case, though. It would only be a matter of time before Dean cornered him again and sweet talked him into drinking more of his amped up demon blood. At first Sam had been so confused he could vomit. He had spent hours fretting over why Dean would do something so cruel, so awful to him in the first place. Even though his older brother was a demon now, that didn't mean that Dean was completely gone, so he had to be able to reason with him somehow. There was always the method of attempting to summon him within a devil's trap, but there was no way of knowing whether it would even work or not. The worst case scenario would be a very pissed off Dean, which would not bode well for Sam or Castiel if he were present.

Sam groaned as he leaned over the cool kitchen counter. He couldn't tell Castiel about any of this. If the angel found out that Sam's demon blood addiction was threatening to come back full force he would be out on saving Dean. The angel would find a way to keep Sam under lock and key for sure, but at the same time Castiel needed Sam for this. He was an angel with weakening grace and Dean knew that. There wasn't much Castiel could do to protect them anymore unless it were a dire emergency; the angel had used up a great deal of his remaining grace to heal Gadreel when they'd found him sprawled out on the countryside in the grass, practically bleeding out.

The cupboard above Sam's head squeaked on its hinges as it swung open to reveal a shelf of ornate glasses, one of which was removed and sat upon the counter's surface. A new bottle of liquor hovered over the glass, a potent amber liquid splashing and leaving a few droplets on the pale surface around the glass as it filled the tumbler to the brim. The bottle was left uncapped and set back within reach as Sam turned around with the glass in hand, leaning back against the counter with one hand while he swallowed a large amount of the alcoholic beverage. It tasted like a bitter poison, but if it was enough to dampen the need rising deep within Sam's stomach it would do for now. His addiction hadn't had a chance to completely consume him yet, but it was only a matter of time. Dean would find a way to force feed him some more of that wonderfully corrupt elixir.

A soft noise of someone clearing their throat brought Sam back down to Earth. He looked across the room to find Crowley standing in the archway, hands in pockets and a patient expression upon his face. The hair prickled on the back of Sam's neck and he took another mouthful of alcohol. He would be needing it to be able to deal with the one person he hated most in the world right now. All the shit that had happened recently was Crowley's fault. He didn't know why or how, but he was certain the demon knew more than he'd let on.

"Well, since you're going to be rude, let me be the first to say 'hello'." Crowley entered the room and stood before Sam, watching him curiously as the the taller man downed more of the amber liquid in his glass. "Bad habit, moose. Beginning to take after your brother."

"Fuck off, Crowley."

"And here I was coming to check on you like the kind little demon that I am." Sam huffed and brushed past Crowley to sit at the kitchen table.

"What do you really want? You don't give a shit about me."

"You're right, I don't particularly hold a soft spot for you. Dean, however... now there's a man worthy of some respect."

"Yeah, about that..." Sam turned to face Crowley with a threatening gaze that was smoothed over by the alcohol in his system. "Whatever you're doing, it's not going to work. You know that, right? Dean doesn't even like you."

"Last I checked I was the one helping your messed up brother through his crisis. You and angel boy seem to be more concerned about finding a cure than Dean himself."

"What do you expect us to do?! Just sit back and watch him turn into something he's hunted for most of his life? We're only doing what he would do, because I know he'd do the same for me." Crowley rolled his eyes.

"Save me your sappy love stories. The Dean you once knew is gone, Sam. You're wasting your time with this wild goose chase. It's time to accept what he is and move on."

"Yeah, because you've got him right where you want him. You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?"

"I knew the risks in taking on the mark, but I did not expect Dean to be joining the ranks so soon. That part was just a plus."

"I don't even know why I'm wasting my time." Sam stood from the table and left his empty glass to leave the kitchen. As his foot reached the threshold Crowley's voice darkened.

"I know it's back, Sam. I can sense his blood pumping through your veins." The King of Hell stepped closer to Sam until he stood inches before his back. "You've been a naughty boy, moose."

Sam closed his eyes in embarrassment and tried his hardest to keep from turning around and punching Crowley square in the jaw. "I didn't ask for that to happen. It won't happen again." Crowley sighed and backed off, his last words fading into the distance as he disappeared.

"Keep lying to yourself, Sam."

"...am. Sam?"

Sam jerked his head in Castiel's direction as he regained his thoughts. They'd been working through the archives for some time and Sam had spaced out for the umpteenth time that afternoon. "Sorry Cas. What were you saying?"

"I was suggesting that you take a moment to rest. You don't look well." Castiel's eyes were full of concern as he watched Sam's every move. It was highly uncomfortable, especially since Sam's mind was so full of guilt and dark secrets. He'd half expected Castiel to sense the demon blood inside of him, but it must not have been enough to detect a difference. He was simply paranoid about the whole thing and it was wearing his nerves thin. At least Dean had stayed away for the day, and it made it easier to gain a clearer perspective. Thankfully Castiel was in his right mind and could continue the research unhindered.

Sam stood from his chair and leaned against the table. He was starting to feel a bit ill, and he knew it was showing on his face. The introduction of demon blood and bad nerves was a heady combination that nearly had him leaning over the toilet. Above all was the shame. He still couldn't wash the memory out of his mind of the things he'd done with his own brother. It had felt wrong, but sinfully wonderful after the head rush and the intake of blood. He tried to tell himself that it would never happen again, that he had simply been weak and off guard then; it was a downright lie to himself and he knew it. He would grow weak and let his guard down once more when the craving became too much.

"I'm okay, Cas. Just need to get some fresh air."

"I'll go with you." Castiel approached Sam and set a comforting hand against his back to gently push him toward the stairs. It was nice to have someone genuinely care, to have someone that he could put a bit more trust in at the moment than anyone else. Castiel was trying his hardest right now – he wanted Dean back just as much as Sam did and that helped to bring some comfort to his troubled mind.

"Yeah, thanks." He stumbled out of the bunker with Castiel in tow and looked up into the bright sky. It was a drastic change to the night he'd been staring at the stars, and was a much more welcome sight; he found it ironic that he was sharing the sunlight with an angel, whereas he shared the moonlight with a demon.

"Have you seen Dean lately?" Castiel stood beside Sam and followed his eyes to the clouds.

"No, not today. I think he's leaving me alone for a while." The angel glanced suspiciously at Sam and watched the taller man's expressions for any sign of deception.

"Did something happen between you two?"

"Hm? No. No, I just... I just told him like it is, you know? I think I finally pissed him off." Sam's heart was beating out of his chest as he felt Castiel stare daggers into him. The angel was a lot smarter than anyone gave him credit for.

"You can talk to me, Sam. We cannot help Dean if we aren't entirely honest with each other."

"There's nothing going on, Cas. Get off my back okay?" Sam's nervous demeanor turned into mild irritation as he forced himself to stare back at the angel, who held his gaze for some time. It was a test, Sam knew. Castiel knew the Winchesters all too well, and it wasn't unlike them to hide important bits of information out of ridiculous pride. Something told Sam that the angel already had an idea of what was going on, but thankfully he didn't seem eager to argue the issue any further.

"Alright." Castiel slid a hand along Sam's jawline and up to his cheek where it rested. Sam was the one to break eye contact first and he watched as the angel came closer, their faces now only inches apart. Castiel's eyes shifted from Sam's to his parted lips before slowly bringing them together. It was a soft and slow kiss that caught Sam completely off guard, but it was comforting all the same. There was no urgency behind it – no feeling of need or personal gain. It was simply soothing and calm, and Sam found himself responding in kind as a pleasant warmth filled his body.

The angel pulled back and watched as Sam slowly opened his eyes. A look of hurt shone behind the beautiful blue that encompassed Castiel's. "Why did you lie to me, Sam?"

Sam's tension returned and he awaited the inevitable. He should have known that it was a terrible attempt to lie to Castiel. "What do you mean?"

The angel shook his head and backed away. "I was worried that this might happen." Sam remained silent as Castiel stared at him in disappointment. "I can barely sense it, but I can taste the blood. You have to stop it or it's going to be out of your control. I need you to keep yourself grounded, Sam."

"Damn it Cas it isn't my fault! He forced it on me, okay? How am I supposed to fight off one of the most powerful demons in Hell by myself?" Sam's hand shot up to the bruise on his neck as he suddenly remembered in an attempt to hide it from Castiel's wandering eyes. It was no wonder he looked suspicious; the purple love bite was probably what brought about Crowley's remark, and it was most likely the reason for Castiel's lack of trust in Sam's word. How he'd forgotten about that small detail he didn't know. He was definitely going to throw holy water in Dean's face for that later.


	4. Chapter 4

_"What, no kiss?" _

_Castiel lowered his eyes in irritation and stared at Crowley, his blood pressure rising as he became more and more impatient with the King of Hell. He was an angel, damn it. Angels did not kiss demons no matter what the circumstances. "I fail to see where kissing would be necessary to the deal." Castiel's hand jutted out in a stiff gesture – one which Crowley chose to decline. The demon glanced at the angel's hand, then back into the ethereal blue eyes burning into him. _

_"Sorry, love. Not the way it works. No kiss, no deal. That is, unless you'd rather not have my assistance with your boy toy squirrel." Crowley tried to hide a smile as he watched the invisible gears turn in the angel's head. He loved pulling Castiel's strings. There was something about ruffling an angel's feathers that made him feel alive again, which was something he honestly wouldn't have thought pleasurable before; ever since he'd become addicted to, and accustomed to, the intake of human blood he found the rush of human anticipation a heady drug. The opportunity to corrupt an angel was just the plus side of the situation. _

_Castiel was livid. As much as he hated Crowley's games, he knew that in the end Crowley was the only one who could help Dean right now. Sam was mostly useless at this point due to the fact that he had been reintroduced to his addiction to demon blood – Dean's blood at that, and Castiel couldn't have Sam making any deals with Crowley in that sort of state. The angel was the only one in his right mind out of everyone anymore. This fact alone made him the only likely candidate to even begin to consider something as stupid as what he was about to do. First, however, there were the terms... _

_"Shaking hands will be sufficient." Castiel clenched his jaw and moved his hand once in the air to signal to Crowley that he wasn't budging. The King, however, responded with an eye roll and a step backward. _

_"Have it your way angel boy. Too bad for the Winchesters. Could really use your help, you know." _

_"Damn it, Crowley! This isn't a game!" _

_"It isn't that difficult. All you have to do is pucker up and I will keep my end of the bargain." _

_Castiel lowered his hand and took a few deep breaths as he looked to the ground. The dark gray institutional floor below his shoes shone a sickening yellow in the strange lighting. It was the oddest thing, Hell being an institution more so than a torturous pit of despair. There was that aspect to it too, of course, but Crowley was more of a business man. He didn't really get his hands dirty unless it was absolutely necessary, and even then he was sure to keep the blood off of his designer suits. A corporate asshole was what he was. A sarcastic, irritating, sassy corporate asshole. _

_The angel glanced back up at Crowley and took a step in his direction. He swallowed hard and made a resolve with himself: If he was going to do this, he was just going to have to get it over with. He was dealing with the King of Hell after all, and the last time he checked demons weren't up to negotiating unless you had holy water pouring down their throats. Castiel needed Crowley's full cooperation in the matter, so torture into submission was not the answer. He steeled himself and closed the distance between them and stared daggers into Crowley's mocking gaze. _

_"Alright. If this is the only way I can acquire your cooperation then I have no choice." The demon smiled and lifted an amused eyebrow. _

_"Well then, what are you waiting for Pizza Man?" _

_Castiel tilted his head to the side and slowly closed his eyes, his stomach lurching with anxiety as he came closer and closer. Crowley was obviously trying to make this as difficult as possible, so it seemed Castiel's only choice was to dive in and then forget about it. Which is exactly what he convinced himself to do as he closed the distance between them. The angel squeezed his eyes shut as he felt the scratchy beard on his face against his own stubble, the smell of sulfur faint but still overtaking his senses as he pressed his lips against the the demon's. _

_Crowley chuckled and placed his hand on the back of Castiel's head, locking their mouths together in a kiss that was lasting longer than the angel could bear. The King ran his tongue along the crease of Castiel's lips, amused at the gasp that it produced from the angel's throat. He was surprised to feel Castiel relent, his mouth opening to welcome the demon's hot breath past his lips. It was a terrible cliché all at once – an angel kissing a demon. Castiel, however, didn't mind it as much as he'd thought. Cliche' or not it was beginning to turn him on. The last time the angel had been kissed like that he'd ended up in bed with the person after, even if it was a reaper. _

_Crowley was a very good kisser, which wasn't something Castiel had even considered. It was supposed to be a quick peck to seal a deal, but damn. The King could kiss like none other, and the angel found himself consumed by one of the many vices he'd enjoyed most while being a human: Lust. He hadn't meant for it to be known to the demon, but since he was only going on borrowed grace that was slowly waning each and every time he used its power he became that much more human again. This fact was causing a problem down below that Castiel tried to hide by backing away – although Crowley had other plans. _

_The King grabbed Castiel's arms and gripped them tight, holding him in place while he deepened the kiss with more than a few love bites that caused Castiel to emit an embarrassing, breathy moan. _

_"St-stop. We need tommph-!" Castiel's words were muffled by the demon's growing aggressiveness, and the angel finally had to use brute force to push Crowley off of him. He staggered back as he tried to catch his breath, his heart pumping blood through his veins at an unbelievably fast pace. The discomfort in his pants he found difficult to will away, so he settled on the idea that getting out now was best. _

_Crowley smiled slyly and ran a finger across his bottom lip. "Castiel... I didn't know you cared." _

_"Enough with your games, Crowley. We're finished here. Now hold up your end of the bargain." _

_"I am a man of my word." The King bowed politely and disappeared in the blink of an eye, leaving Castiel standing confused and very frustrated. His human body would have to deal with it for now. He had more important things to do, like returning to the bunker and checking on Sam. There was no telling how long Dean would leave him alone again, or if he'd even been back while the angel had been gone. It was hard enough keeping watch over one of them; now Castiel had to keep a hawk's eye on both of them. _


	5. Chapter 5

The ride to the diner was an awkward one that evening. Castiel remained silent in the passenger seat while Sam leaned out the window as he drove, the cool summer air smoothing his hair back as he watched the sun set. Normally they would have taken Castiel's car, but it just didn't feel right. Sam was craving some sense of normalcy, and the Impala was the only thing he could grasp on to for that. Although it did bring a bit of comfort, it also reminded him of the days when Dean sat where he did, and he where Castiel was. If he weren't driving, Sam would have closed his eyes and savored the memories until his heart hurt. It was probably for the best that he remained focused on the here and now anyway; he didn't need the thought of Dean to cloud his judgment right now. He might just do something stupid again, and sacrificing himself wouldn't do anyone any good. The idea of a permanent death did tempt him, however. His crazy emotions were taunting him to just do it – he was behind the wheel, it was that easy. It would be over within a second, and then he wouldn't care anymore.

A lump formed in Sam's throat and he steeled himself against the depression consuming him. No, that wasn't the answer. He had to stay strong. There was hope for Dean and he had to keep truckin' for that reason alone. He just hoped that Dean would relent and keep away like he had done for the past two days. It was a mystery as to why Dean hadn't come around after what had happened between him and Sam. Dean had been so consumed in his darkness that he hadn't really seemed to care about his brother's well being, except that he sort of did. He could have done so much worse, even if what he did crossed one too many boundaries. Sam still had a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach about that, but he knew he was just as guilty in a way. He had given in and actually returned Dean's advances under the influence. Some would say that it only brought out his own secret desires toward his brother, but Sam honestly did not want to think about that right now. He needed to focus on relaxing and getting Castiel to ease up around him again.

The Impala pulled into the diner just as the sky turned a deep red orange. The red retro sign above the door flickered before it came to life, and the bell chimed as Sam and Castiel walked through the door. They seated themselves in a red leather booth near the back of the restaurant and waited in an awkward silence for the waitress. The angel ordered nothing, his love for food having dissipated ever since he'd gained his angel power back. Sam was content with coffee and a salad, and as soon as they were alone once more he set his laptop on the table. Before he was able to pop it open, a gentle hand rested atop his and he looked up to see Castiel watching him. For some reason it made heat crawl up the back of his neck to his ears, and he slid his hand back.

"Sam, you should not concern yourself with doing research here. You need to rest."

"Thanks Cas, but I'll be fine. I just need something to eat and I'll be ready to go again."

"Sam..." The tone was one of warning and Castiel's gentle expression turned slightly darker. "We both know that you are in no state to overwhelm yourself." Sam sighed and leaned back to run his hands down his face.

"I'm not that far gone. It wasn't enough to completely fuck me up so stop treating me like I'm some weakling that can't handle a bit of sleep deprivation." Castiel stiffened and scowled, turning his head to watch out the window as the sky turned darker.

"Forgive me for showing concern for your well being."

A few moments of silence passed before Sam relaxed and instantly felt like a moron. Castiel was right – the angel was only concerned and nothing more. It wasn't like the guy to demean anyone, especially not Sam or Dean. As far as Castiel was concerned, the boys were some of the most strong and admirable on the planet, even if they didn't feel that way themselves. Sam had never really been that close with Castiel in the past, that was mostly Dean, but he knew the angel was a good guy. He didn't deserve all the shit he had been getting lately, especially with Dean going dark side.

"Look, I'm sorry, Cas. I know you mean well, I shouldn't have gotten pissed. I'm just trying to deal with the fact that-" Sam glanced around to ensure their privacy, "my own brother did that to me. That sort of thing is something you just never come to terms with. I mean, I don't want him in that way, you know? He's my brother, and I want him to get better. That's all."

"You don't have to worry about my opinion of you two. The bond you share is something I've yet to see in anyone else." Castiel finally turned to face Sam again, his expression neutral once more. "As far as I am concerned, I believe the connection you have with Dean is beautiful. How you two decide to interpret that connection is up to you, and no matter what form it may become, nothing can take away the beauty that it contains."

Sam bit his lip to keep from smiling as the cheesy words rolled off of Castiel's tongue. "It's really not like that. I mean, I don't know how I feel or how I should take things. He's still Dean, and I have no way of knowing whether he acted on his own will or if it was the demon side of him coming through-" Sam glanced awkwardly up at the waitress who approached with more coffee and a salad, and waited for her to leave before continuing. "Either way, no matter what happens, we have to focus on fixing him."

"I agree." Castiel's smile brought Sam's attention to his lips, and he remembered the kiss that he had shared with the angel earlier that day. He wanted to ask about it, but was at a complete loss as to how to broach the subject. He hadn't really minded it, which he found strange due to the fact that he normally ever dated women. The thing between him and Dean had been messed up, so that really didn't even count in his mind at the moment. He was completely conscious when the angel had kissed him though, and he hadn't exactly been repelled. It had created an odd sensation that sent a feeling of comfort throughout his entire body, and it had put his mind to rest. It was probably some weird angel thing, but it was nice.

Sam had downed half of his coffee and a few bites of his salad before looking up at Castiel, who was watching the cars go by outside. "Hey, Cas?" The angel turned instantly and gave him his full attention. "About that... that kiss. Um, why did you...?"

"I was giving you comfort. I knew that your mind had to be troubled after what had happened."

"So that weird feeling I got from it, that was all you?"

"I enjoy bringing you and your brother comfort, Sam. That feeling was simply my love for you." Sam blushed visibly now and cleared his throat loudly.

"That's... I don't know what to say I guess."

"I am not bound by any gender as humans are. It's only my vessel that- well, I suppose I would be considered a male in that sense to you. My point is that gender has no meaning to me where intimacy is concerned, and I am sorry if I offended you."

"No no, you didn't offend me. I was surprised actually. To be honest, I thought you were just trying to probe me for answers or something." Sam groaned internally at the word 'probe'. Jesus why did he have to use that word.

"I will admit that was part of my intent, but I first and foremost was concerned about your comfort." Sam nodded and took another bite of his salad. Now the awkward silence was back and he didn't know what to say. It seemed Castiel was the one for questions now, however. "May I ask if you would be opposed to kissing me again?"

"Cas-" Sam closed his eyes and tried to hide his face in his hands as the waitress passed by, shooting them a strange glance. "We can't talk about that here. It's really not socially acceptable for two guys to be kissing in the middle of a diner."

"Then shall we move somewhere more socially acceptable?" If it hadn't come from Castiel, Sam would have taken that as a pickup line.

"Yeah. We can talk more about it after I finish my salad. I'll be right back." Sam stood and walked to the opposite side of the dining room where a bathroom door stood unlocked. He slipped inside and closed the door, then turned to the sink and splashed some water on his face. God when had everything gotten so confusing? Not only had Dean jumped his bones the other night, now he had an angel out there that wanted to lock lips with him. Things couldn't possibly get any worse.

As Sam leaned over the sink with his eyes closed, the bathroom door opened quietly and a man stepped inside - slowly closing the door and locking it behind him. As soon as the lock clicked Sam looked in the direction of the noise to find Castiel standing before him, the angel's face as calm as always. "Jesus, Cas. If you had to use the bathroom you could have just told me when I got up."

"I no longer have to worry about that." Castiel approached Sam and set his hand on the taller man's face. "I believe this would be a more acceptable place to discuss things, since we are out of the public eye."

"Did anyone see you come in here?"

"Is that important?" Castiel gave Sam his confused puppy face as he stepped closer, their bodies now barely touching.

"Kind- kind of. We can't do this here, Cas."

"It seems to be a popular trope in various romance novels and in film." The angel ran a hand down Sam's arm and laced his fingers through much longer ones. "Unless I am mistaken?"

"Yeah, well that's fiction." Sam could feel Castiel's breath on his skin now as the angel closed his eyes and set his lips against Sam's neck, directly over the purple mark.

"I am sorry, Sam. I wish I could take your pain away." Castiel's tongue slid gently over the mark as goosebumps crawled up Sam's skin, causing a pleasant pulse in his jeans.

"Mmm, Cas stop, stop." Castiel brought his head back and looked into Sam's eyes, the blue in his own seeming to shine with his grace as his half human heart pounded against his chest. There was a need there that brought Sam's emotions back up into his throat. They were both hurting right now because of what had happened to Dean, and Sam knew that it was the only reason either of them were reacting in this way. He allowed himself to be kissed as the angel placed his lips against Sam's, the warm feeling coursing back through his body now causing him to become a mess against Castiel as they pressed into each other.

The angel was all tongue as Sam tried to bite at his lips. Their bodies quickly became entwined as they let their hands roam freely, neither caring anymore about what was on the other side of the door. Everything else could have gone to Hell in that moment; neither would have even noticed. It was all a complete haze as Sam barely realized his own actions having now backed Castiel up against the bathroom sink. The angel groaned and slid his hands up Sam's shirt to run his fingers along the muscle, each digit tracing the patterns until they reached his hip bones. Sam rocked his hips forward against Castiel and felt the hardness in the angel's pants, gaining a moan from the body he had pinned so tight against the sink he was sure it had to be uncomfortable. This realization brought a sense of reason into his brain and he backed off reluctantly.

"No, Cas. We can't do this here."

"We can... head back to the bunker if you- if you'd prefer." Castiel was breathless as he slumped back against the sink, his face flushed from arousal and one side of his shirt was pulled from his pants. The sight alone made it hard for Sam to control himself, but he knew that now was not the time for things like this.

"Yes, we should get back. This, though... We shouldn't be doing this while we're supposed to be working."

"Sam... there is nothing wrong with taking a much needed break. Please."

Sam watched as Castiel pushed himself up and straightened his clothing, then as he planted one last soft kiss on his lips. He stared into the angel's eyes as he fought with himself, and then he thought of Dean. He really was no good to Dean if he was half dead from exhaustion and stress, and he had to at least find one happy moment in all of this crazy. "Alright. Let me pay the bill and grab my laptop, then we'll go back to the bunker."


	6. Chapter 6

_This chapter has explicit Sastiel sex, so be warned._

By the time the Impala pulled into its usual spot before the bunker all had grown dark. It was slightly windy outside and the sky was overcast due to an oncoming storm – the rumbling of thunder could be heard in the distance and it was beginning to sprinkle rain. Sam sunk back into his seat as the engine clinked and closed his eyes. He was painfully aware of the angel staring at him from the other side of the car and it made his skin itch. They'd managed to escape the diner with only a few odd looks after leaving the bathroom, and it seemed Castiel hadn't been affected by any of it. He had only been human for a short time, but it seemed he lacked the ability to realize that two men exiting the same bathroom at the same time... well, it was obvious what it looked like even though they hadn't gone any further than kissing. Oh, the kissing. It had been a little bit too nice, and the memory had Sam becoming fidgety.

Castiel shifted in his seat and moved closer to Sam, shedding his coat on his way. It was clear that the angel wasn't willing to wait until they were inside. "Is this a more socially acceptable location, Sam?"

Sam snorted a laugh and opened his eyes to look at the man now crawling over him. "Close enough I guess." The rain began to come down harder as Sam grabbed Castiel's hips to guide him over onto his lap the rest of the way, and his breath caught in his throat as the angel latched onto his lips with his own. This time Castiel held nothing back, his hands roaming across Sam's chest to push his over shirt out of the way before lifting the t-shirt beneath. It came off in one smooth movement and they resumed their kisses without missing a beat – fog now forming on the windows as their breathing became heavier and temperatures began to rise. The thunder was surrounding them now along with the storm that had picked up quickly.

Castiel fumbled with the buttons on his shirt until Sam slid his hands away to help. Once the angel's shirt was hanging open he shrugged it off with a bit of difficulty, his elbow bumping the car horn in the process. Neither seemed to notice or care as they finally felt skin on skin, Sam struggling to turn his head away to get Castiel to take a breather. "Hey, Cas. Wait a minute."

The angel shifted with Sam as he laid across the seats, his back sticking to the black leather. It was an awkward position for Castiel as he attempted to straddle Sam's hips once more, and after a bit of moving around they both dived back in. Castiel began sliding his hips against Sam's in a desperate attempt to feel _something_. Anything that would fix the warm ache that rested in the pit of his stomach. He moaned as Sam's hands slid around to his warm back that was already becoming sticky with sweat. Fingers continued to trail down lower until they reached the waistline of his pants, then slipped below.

Castiel fought with his belt until it slid free and unbuttoned his pants to allow Sam further access. He closed his eyes and bit his bottom lip as hands slipped further down his boxers and squeezed his ass, the sensation sending a chill up his spine despite the heat surrounding them. He leaned down and captured Sam's lips once more as he thrust his hips against the hardness in Sam's jeans.

Sam slipped one of his hands around to Castiel's front and slid his fingers along the bit of wetness that had formed there, taking the chance to slide the zipper on the angel's pants down the rest of the way to gain more room to move. Castiel took the hint and lifted his hips to slide his pants off with his boxers and kicked them to the floor, giving Sam a wonderful view to take in. The lightning outside illuminated the sheen of sweat on Castiel's body as his chest rose and fell with his heavy breathing; his angelic blue eyes were glazed over and staring straight back into Sam's, the message clear enough. Even so, Sam needed to hear his voice.

"What do you want, Cas?"

"I want to make you feel good, to take your pain away. Please, let me."

Sam wrapped his arms around the angel and drew their bodies together as they kissed, shifting his hips as he felt Castiel's hands running along the waistline of his jeans. He felt the button pop free and the zipper slide, and shifted until he was able to slide them down. Now that both were free from restrictions they moved their hips together in a steady rhythm, the sweat and precome between them creating a slick lubrication on their skin. Sam slid a hand between them and ran his fingers through the mixture, then moved around and reached farther back until he slid a finger inside Castiel. The angel bucked his hips and gasped, his mouth falling to Sam's neck where he latched on with a love bite right next to the purple mark that Dean had left. Sam groaned as the friction from Castiel's thrusts made him burn with need, and he added another finger. The angel sat up and rocked on Sam's hand as he grabbed onto the back of the seat, his own hand sliding down to relieve himself of the pulsing burn driving him insane.

"Sam... want it now. Please."

The sound of Castiel's deep, pleading voice fanned the fire burning within Sam. He removed his fingers and grabbed onto the angel's slender hips, guiding him down slowly and gently until he was surrounded by tight, hot flesh. Sam froze as he adjusted to the feeling, and he looked up at Castiel to make sure the angel was alright. He was met with the sight of an angelic being completely undone, back arched and lips parted as small sounds of either pain or pleasure escaped his throat. After a few seconds Sam felt Castiel lift his hips, then slide back down gently, and he repeated the motion until it became less painful.

They were soon moving at an even rhythm, fog now completely masking the windows to the outside. Condensation was causing water droplets to slide down the windshield as the rain continued to pound against the Impala, the thunder having faded away into the distance again but leaving the silent lightning behind. The seats began to creak as Sam thrust his hips faster, his leg dropping to the floor to gain better leverage. He knew Castiel was close by the way the angel's hips rolled and his eyes fluttered shut, and he kept up the pace until he felt an unbelievable tightness around him that made him clench his teeth. Castiel's voice was amplified within the small space as he cried out Sam's name, his orgasm ripping through him in unbearable waves that caused him to curl forward. Sam's fingers dug into his back as he caught the angel against him, his own release building quickly with each pulse that caused Castiel to twitch.

Sam fell over the edge just seconds after, his entire body feeling as if it had been doused with cool and then warm water. He held Castiel tight, refusing to let go until he was finally calm once more. They both remained in each others arms like that for some time, just listening to the rain outside as it lightened up and as they caught their breath. Sam was the first to break the silence between them, his voice quiet.

"Hey, you okay?" Castiel pushed himself up onto his hands and smiled down at Sam before setting their foreheads together.

"I am fine, Sam. Are you feeling better?"

"Yeah, I am. Thanks Cas."

"I'm glad." The angel sat up and gathered their clothes, moving to sit in the driver's seat while Sam sat opposite. Once they had redressed themselves Sam leaned forward and cleared a small area of the windshield to look outside.

"Still raining. Want to wait it out?"

"A bit of rain would feel good right now, wouldn't it?" Sam smiled and set his hand on the door handle, opening it and stepping outside. The rain was still coming down heavily, but not as bad as before. Castiel soon joined him at his side and they stood there together looking up at the sky. Sam closed his eyes and let the feeling of the cool water wash over him, imagining that every worry, every bit of doubt or fear that he'd experienced within the past few weeks was being cleansed from his body. He looked down when he felt two drenched arms wrap around him, and leaned into Castiel as their lips met in one long final kiss. It was exactly what Sam had needed, and he already felt so much lighter than he had in days.

When Castiel pulled away Sam smiled like an idiot before looking toward the bunker entrance. "We should get inside. I need to get at least a few hours of sleep."

"Yes, I agree. I am glad I was able to help you, Sam."

"Yeah, me too."


	7. Chapter 7

"This is fuckin' ridiculous!"

Dean slammed open the doors to Crowley's office and strode in, eyes shining a demonic black with anger. The fury he felt inside was tenfold compared to the tortured souls screaming out there in the dungeon-like abyss. It made what little that was left of his humanity ache with a hurt he hadn't felt since Sam had seen him die, and that was saying a lot. He couldn't believe it – wouldn't have believed it – without seeing it for himself, or rather, smelling it. The Impala reeked of sweat and sex when he had returned to it that night after the storm. Unfortunately there were only two options to consider: One, Sam was taking some time out to get some ass from a local bar, or two, Sam and Castiel had something funny going on behind Dean's back. Option number one, while at one point a reasonable explanation when Sam had lost his soul, was out of the question. It wasn't like Sam to just go out and grab a random fuck like his brother, so option two was, unfortunately, looking more and more likely.

Dean had sunk into a chair after kicking a side table and throwing a few odd objects across the room, one being an ornate glass tumbler which had shattered against the wall. Apparently it was enough commotion to attract the very King of Hell himself, who approached his office with apprehension and maybe a little bit of preparation to kick some ass if need be. His face twisted in anger as he gazed upon the mess around the room, then turned around to Dean who had paid him no mind.

"What the bloody hell is your problem?! You've destroyed my god damned office!"

"Don't get your panties in a twist. Why do you even need an office anyway?"

"It makes me feel important." Crowley calmed as soon as he had exploded and crossed the room to sit behind his desk. He cringed at the sight of the shattered tumbler by his feet. "I'm sure you've got a good reason for paying me this lovely little visit."

"It's Sam," Dean's blood boiled and he dug his fingers into the upholstery of the chair, the sound of ripping meeting Crowley's ears as he glared, "and Cas."

"I believe it was quite obvious that betrayal was imminent sooner or later."

"They fucked in my car, man!" Dean stood and began to pace around the room as Crowley poured himself a drink from the glass bottle on his desk. He received a look of death in response to his offer to share and shrugged it off, downing some of the amber liquid.

"Could have been worse."

"How could it have been worse than that?!"

"Could've tried to cure you. You know, make you human again."Crowley shuddered and took another drink.

"Sam is off limits, I thought I made that obvious." Dean fell back into his chair. That all too familiar human depression washed over him like a tidal wave. Sammy was his, damn it. Why would his brother go out of his way to do something so out of character?

Unless it wasn't Sam's fault.

Sam would never initiate anything with Castiel. It had to be the angel. He must have found out about the demon blood and what Dean had done that night, and now was probably trying to find some fucked up way to heal Sam, or purify him or whatever. Dean clenched his jaw tight and stood slowly as he tried to tame his demonic rage.

"I'm gonna kill that fuckin' angel."

Crowley's eyebrows rose in wonder and he leaned back in his chair to get a better view of Hell's newest recruit. "Remind me never to piss you off, mate."

Before Crowley had even finished his sentence Dean was gone.

*

The lights were on in the bunker and someone was still awake inside. It was either one of two people or both, but either way would end with the same result. Dean was not about to let what had just happened pass on by. Castiel had no business touching Sam like that, and Dean would make sure to get the message across loud and clear. He definitely wasn't afraid of the angel anymore; the guy didn't even have enough angel mojo to fly himself anywhere let alone do any significant damage to Dean. He was going to pay.

"Hey, Cas." Dean appeared at once inside the bunker to find Castiel alone. The angel looked up from his research he was conducting at the desk in the center of the room, but didn't seem the least bit surprised, not like Sam would have been, and Sam didn't seem to be anywhere in sight which was for the best. What was going to go down would not be pretty.

"Dean." Castiel stood from his chair and regarded Dean carefully as he approached the desk, eyes flashing black before he closed them and stopped. He had to control his anger for now.

"What you looking at there?" Dean nodded to the papers and books on the desktop. Castiel regarded them for a second and sighed.

"It's research. Sam and I are going to help you, Dean."

"Uh huh." Dean bit his lip and slid his hands into his pockets as his fingers twitched. Just hearing Sam's name come out of the angel's mouth pissed him off. "You and Sam been working together a lot lately?"

"We... we don't have much time. We need to put in all the effort we possibly can right now." Castiel's voice was hesitant as he answered and a light blush crawled into his cheeks. Dean's control over his temper finally broke.

"Been workin' real hard I see. Car told me that much." Dean's eyes flashed black as he clenched his jaw and slid his hands out of his pockets. Castiel's nervousness was obvious behind his eyes, and it only fanned the fire that was the demon rage roaring in Dean's veins.

"Dean, I have no idea what you're-" Castiel was cut short as Dean swung his fist, making contact with the angel's jaw. As a human Dean wouldn't have left much of a mark, but as a demon he'd left a definite bruise.

"Don't play that fucking game with me you angelic asshole. You think I don't know what's going on?!" Castiel slid his fingers across the bruise on his jaw before looking at Dean with a steely gaze.

"Sam needs someone right now, and that someone cannot be you. You've already done enough, why can't you leave your brother alone?"

"What I do with my brother is none of your business. You have no right to come between us like you have."

"The only one splitting you two apart is yourself. He's afraid of you, Dean! I gave him security. I gave him what you can't."

Castiel stumbled back as Dean's fist made contact again. The angel was pinned against the wall in seconds after the hit, Dean's hand now at Castiel's throat. "Listen here you feathery son of a bitch. If you even think of touching Sammy again I will end you, you understand?"

"Do you really want Sam to see you like this?" Castiel groaned as Dean tightened his grip around the angel's throat. "You're becoming a monster, Dean. You would have welcomed Death over what you've turned into."

Dean loosened his grip and backed away, watching as Castiel slid onto the floor. Yes, at one point he would have preferred Death's presence over this thing he'd become. When Metatron had stabbed him that night he had been ready to die. He knew it was over then, but he couldn't have predicted any of this. If he'd known what he was to become, then yes, he would have taken better measures to be at Death's door permanently. Unfortunately he'd been too consumed by the bloodlust the mark had created within him and all reason had flown out the window with his sanity in his last moments. It would have been obvious if he could have seen his own face right before it had all ended. He had lost his humanity long before the blade that Metatron had driven into his body killed him. None of that mattered now though. He had to continue to protect Sam in the only way that he knew how, and right now he had the ability to give Sam something amazing. It would also bring them closer together in the long run, and Sam would eventually thank him for it.

Dean waved his finger in Castiel's direction as a warning. "You don't touch Sammy, okay? He'll be fine. And if I do find out you've been fucking with him again I'll rip your god damned wings off, got that?" Castiel just stared back in response, but it was good enough for Dean. At least the angel wasn't willing to argue or press the issue anymore, so he backed off.

Dean was gone in the blink of an eye, and the angel knew where he had probably gone. He doubted Dean would wake Sam from his sleep so he would leave the two alone. Castiel knew he couldn't tell Sam what had transpired, it would only stress him out even more and the poor guy needed some rest; he had been through enough already. It wasn't the only secret Castiel had to keep anyway. The other one was about due to be confronted, and it would best be handled as soon as possible. Unfortunately that meant finding Crowley.

*

Although the room was pitch black Sam knew there was someone else present besides himself. He sat up quickly and searched the darkness as his eyes adjusted, and they finally settled on a figure hunched over his desk. "Dean."

"Hey Sammy." Sam could hear the smile in his brother's voice. There was no trace of devious intent however, so he allowed himself to relax, but only slightly. The last time they'd had a quiet moment together Dean had turned on him lighting fast. It hurt to realize it, but he couldn't trust his big brother anymore.

"What do you want?"

"Haven't seen you in a while. Just wanted to make sure you weren't dyin' on me or anything."

"I think the only worry I have right now is you, Dean." Sam swung his legs over the bed and rested his elbows on his knees, and he focused fully on his brother. Dean had taken a seat at the desk and seemed to be positioned in a similar manner, which was comforting. It was at least a sign that Dean wanted to make peace. They were still brothers after all, and Sam would never forget that much.

"So uh... you're probably pretty freaked out by me now."

"Kind of an understatement."

"Hey man, I get it. I fucked up. I'm sorry."

"You are?" Sam raised a skeptical eyebrow as he watched Dean lift his head. Their eyes met for a short time before Dean looked away again. Sam didn't feel the least bit guilty in hoping that what his brother felt was complete shame. At least it would show that he was still mostly human. "Give me a good reason why I should believe you right now?"

Dean sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I just can't help it sometimes. All the shit that's been goin' on, everything that's happened lately has my head twisted." Sam swallowed hard and his nerves tensed as Dean walked over to the bed and sat down beside him. "I never meant to hurt you. I never meant for any of this to happen. I can't help feeling like this could have all been avoided, like I was lied to."

"I think it's obvious who the culprit is there."

"Yeah, I know."

"So, mind telling me why you seem so cool with everything? You know the asshole lied to you, and I know the Dean that was once human would have tried harder to fight the thing you've become. What's going on?"

Dean leaned over and rested his head on Sam's shoulder. His eyes drifted shut and he remained silent for just a moment, his intentions purely to enjoy the comfort of his brother's presence. Sam only twitched slightly but felt bad for doing it. It wasn't his fault he was slightly traumatized now by what his brother had done to him. He had tried to move on from it - had tried to forget by finding affection in the angel, which he genuinely appreciated and enjoyed, but whenever his mind would drift back to Dean he felt anxious. It made it hard to enjoy the small comforts that his brother tried to offer now. He was also still very confused. Sam still hadn't been able to sort out how he honestly felt about his brother touching him in that way, sans the demon blood. That was just wrong. The fever that had sent him into made him do things he normally wouldn't have done. The more antagonizing side of himself made him wonder if it simply brought out his own true desires.

Dean opened his eyes and turned to rest his forehead against his brother's shoulder. "You try being a demon and tell me how easy it is to keep a grip on your own sanity."

"Alright. So I don't understand and I probably, hopefully, never will. Are you at least going to cooperate with me and Cas if we find a way to help you?"

Dean drew in a deep breath and held it for a second before letting it back out slowly. There was a slight edge to his voice as he spoke. "Yeah whatever. I just want it to be you and no one else, alright? I don't care who helps you do the geeky shit, but if anyone's gonna heal me it has to be you, Sammy." Dean lifted his head and carefully turned his brother's face to meet his. "Promise me, Sam. No one else."

"I promise. No one but me."

"If you can even find a cure in the first place." Dean brought his voice to a near whisper as he rested his forehead against Sam's. "Only one thing was enough to stop Cain. Know what that was?"

"No... no I don't." Sam's breath was coming short as his heart pounded nervously in his chest. He desperately wanted Dean to create some distance.

"He fell in love, Sam. Found someone who wanted him the way he was, someone who didn't give a shit what he was. Maybe that's all I need."

"... Okay. You're really freaking me out right now. 'No chick flick moments'? What happened to that?"

Dean laughed and clasped his hand around the back of Sam's neck. "Looks like you got me acting like a pansy. Bitch."

"Jerk." Sam failed to hold back the smile that was tugging at the corners of his mouth. "At least that sounded more like the Dean I used to know."

"I'm still in here, baby boy."

Sam inhaled sharply as Dean pressed his lips gently against his brother's. It wasn't forceful or malicious as it had been last time, and it allowed Sam's brain a bit more clearance to process what was happening. It was definitely odd; even stranger was the fact that Sam actually gave it a chance instead of jerking away. It was just a kiss anyway, and it was Dean. It was his own brother's breath in his mouth, the taste of his own flesh and blood and it should have made him feel disgusted. For some strange reason it didn't though. He didn't have the desire to pull back or to push Dean away. It was just... nice. The gentleness of it all was a welcome sign that Dean still had a human heart.

Dean smiled as he pulled back and rubbed his thumb across the warm skin on the back of Sam's neck. "Better?"

"Yeah. I guess it was." Sam closed his eyes as Dean brought a hand around to the side of his face, his brother's thumb running across his bottom lip.

"Sorry I lost my shit the first time. Wanted to make it up to you."

"Don't ruin it, Dean."

"Just forget about it, okay?"

Sam sighed and looked into his brother's familiar green eyes. "Okay. Just learn to control yourself. You realize I can't trust you any more because of that."

"I know." Dean went silent for a moment before continuing. "Hey Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"Love you, baby boy."

Dean disappeared before Sam had a chance to respond, even if he could manage a response. Rarely if at all had he heard Dean say those words, but this time he knew they meant something different. They weren't words of brotherly sentiment. The meaning went much deeper than just familial bond; Dean was in love with Sam, which was something that Sam's brain couldn't register. It was that moral wall naturally implanted by mother nature that Sam would have to break through to fully understand. And he really did want to understand.


End file.
